The below excerpt is from the self help psychology book, Be Your Own Therapist.
The Caviar of Sex
The Caviar of Sex (as defined by a woman): sex in a context of a
loving long-term committed relationship. The Caviar of Sex
(as defined by a man): sex with a Hollywood sex symbol.
While many, perhaps most, men eventually do move toward the
above woman's view about the ideal sexual experience, this move
usually does not come from following a "should." Instead, they
discover that sex in a loving relationship is more satisfying
than a quickie with a new partner. They change their view out of
experience. Unfortunately, many men never seem to grow up in
this regard because of their fear of a deep lasting relationship.
| Tip for men who want more sex: Pay close attention to how your sexual WORDS are affecting your partner. Some words will be offensive and some will be arousing, depending upon your partner.
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It is also unfortunate that many women who believe that loving
sex is The Caviar of Sex often put down other forms of sexual
expression. For them, sex in a significant relationship becomes
the only OK form of sexual expression. While significant
relationships might be wonderful, they are not always available.
Not everyone at all times has them. Yet our sexuality is ever
present. Sometimes it leads women into totally inappropriate
relationships just to satisfy (1)a sex urge or (2)a neurotic
trap of "you should be in relationship."
A belief in the necessity for an open marriage is not popular.
Yet the freedom to explore outside marriage does seem essential
for some, whether or not they do roam. Those who react most
negatively to infidelity seem often confronted with it. Earth
School lessons (see Chapter 11) may be at work here, giving such
people roaming partners. Thus, they have the opportunity to move
beyond their fears and unhappy feelings about unfaithfulness.
Another @#$%^& growth opportunity! Many were horrified by the
O'Neills' book, Open Marriage, and badly misinterpreted its
meaning. (An open marriage does not imply that sex with partners
outside the relationship will take place, but that the freedom
is given to one's partner to do so.) Despite its controversy,
Open Marriage contains valuable information about marriage and
ways to move beyond one's discomfort with a roaming partner. I
recommend that you read it if infidelity and/or a roaming
partner are part of your life.
Next Excerpt 
| If most pornography bothers you, then I suggest you start changing yourself instead of attempting to "reform" others.
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More Excerpts This Chapter
Psychology of Sex Education - Psychological Sexual Health Care
The Caviar of Sex
What About Your Dreadful Sexual Dream Last Night?
Overcoming Our Puritan Heritage
Sex By The Scorecard
Do We Choose Our Sexual Preferences?
Sexual Boxes
Treatment Of Gay Men, Lesbians And Bisexuals
Achieving A Calmer Pornography Viewpoint 1
2
Sex & The Catholic Church
Rape
Sex Therapy
Sex Therapy We All Received
Women And Men Will Never Be The Same Sexually
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