|
You desperately try to forget that dream with its unapproved
contents. It revealed the possibility of your worst sexual
fears: the "wrong" partner, the "wrong" sex act, nakedness,
exposure, impotence, incest, pedophilia, homosexuality, sadism,
masochism, lack of orgasm, bestiality or _______. (Fill the
blank with that dreadful sexual terror lurking within you.)
Because of that dream you have immediately leaped to the worst
conclusion about yourself. What next? |
|
Past Survey
|
| Q: Concerning my X-rated sexual
dreams: |
|
|
First, acknowledge your dread, as it is a valid truth for you
that you need to explore. It doesn't usually mean that you are
heading toward that particular dreaded sexual behavior. Instead,
it is often a wake-up call for you to do your own therapy (with
or without a paid therapist). Some psychological causes of such
fears/ dreams are:
(1)Our Puritan heritage affects us all. See next section.
(2)Our childhood traumas of being excluded and abandoned by
parents/peers often make it not OK to be different sexually. If
this is the sole cause of your dreadful dream, then moving
beyond those childhood traumas (which can take time) will end
that type of dream.
(3)Often the dream-people give us the clue about where we need
to grow. If I dream incestuously about a parent, I may need to
explore [a]my childhood traumas associated with getting physical
affection from that parent, [b]my inability to have such
fantasies when I was four years old, [c]my fears of sex with an
adult of that parent's sex and [d]the abuse I suffered at the
hands of that parent. If I dream of sex that is not with adults,
then I need to explore possible fears within me of being an
adult sexually. If I uncomfortably dream of sadism or masochism,
where did I suffer pain, abuse or degradation in my past?
(4)Many sexual dreams today are triggered by the traumas
resulting from our lack of childhood emotional love and physical
affection. Much sexual behavior in waking life is also driven
by these old traumas of lack of love and affection. (But men on average would still have much more sexual
interest than women because of testosterone even if all their
neurotic sex drives could be eliminated.) Some homosexual
dreams, for both heterosexuals and homosexuals, have their roots
in fears of emotionally loving and being physically affectionate
with members of one's own sex.
| Celebration Time: If we are such a sexist society why do men vote as much as they do for women candidates? Why do blacks with a B+ high school average have a better chance than whites of entering college? |
Tip. A dreadful sexual dream is a wake-up call for you to look
at yourself, not to leap to the worst possible conclusion about
the dream's meaning. Disregarding the dream will often cause its
return in a more dreadful form.
Next Excerpt 
More Excerpts This Chapter
Psychology of Sex Education - Psychological Sexual Health Care
THE CAVIAR OF SEX
WHAT ABOUT YOUR DREADFUL SEXUAL DREAM LAST NIGHT?
OVERCOMING OUR PURITAN HERITAGE
SEX BY THE SCORECARD
DO WE CHOOSE OUR SEXUAL PREFERENCES?
SEXUAL BOXES
TREATMENT OF GAY MEN, LESBIANS AND BISEXUALS
ACHIEVING A CALMER PORNOGRAPHY VIEWPOINT 1
2
SEX & THE CATHOLIC CHURCH
RAPE
SEX THERAPY
SEX THERAPY WE ALL RECEIVED
WOMEN AND MEN WILL NEVER BE THE SAME SEXUALLY
This Chapter's Quiz
Book Table of Contents
Archived PG-rated Sex Jokes: 1
2
3
4
5
HGH Endorsement - Growth Hormone (Human)
WHAT ABOUT YOUR DREADFUL SEXUAL DREAM LAST NIGHT? © 1995-99
