SUFFERING SMARTER IS DUMB
The following excerpt is from the self help
psychology book, Be Your Own Therapist.
There is a process that unfortunately happens with too much
regularity in some therapies. Emphasis on insight often results
in insight becoming the therapeutic goal. Such a goal often just
leads to rational explanations of my lousy behavior or my
stressed-out condition. "I do this or am distressed by that
because I was abused by Dad. Of course I am distressed by that.
Of course I do that." My insight may be valid, for Dad's abuse
may be the original trauma or learning that fostered today's
problems. And yes, I would always agree that the reaction I just
had (or the action I just took) was exactly right for me based
upon my entire life history. I then need to ask a most unpopular
question, "Do I want to act or react the same way next time?".
Such a question implies that change is very possible, and my
first reaction may often be disbelief that such change is
possible. (See Chapter 8.)
| The majority of us can be dreadfully inhumane if we are following directions from a person in authority.
|
The bright focus on insight all too often causes a shadow to be
cast over the more appropriate therapeutic goals of not being
stressed that way anymore and not acting that way anymore.
Understanding distress or the etiology of lousy behavior is
often just a step along the path toward changing actions and
relieving distress. Those who stay with insight usually have
many insights but are still suffering with the difficulties that
originally propelled them into therapy. I call this "suffering
smarter," but it does seem dumb.
While the psychoanalytic path is known for its emphasis on
insight, it is not the only path where clients sometimes fall
into the "suffering smarter" trap. Intellectual clients and
therapists seem to be the ones most prone to "suffering
smarter." By clinging to insight, intellectual techniques often
avoid necessary (1)upset feelings, (2)unwanted impulses and
(3)distasteful confusion. It is a trap that can affect almost
any therapy. This implies that you, the buyer, must beware. If
your insights are not leading to behavior change or to now feeling OK about situations that used to be bothersome, then you
are likely to be "suffering smarter." You need to evaluate what
is happening in your therapy.
Next Excerpt 
More Excerpts This Chapter
RECOMMENDED GOAL OF THERAPY: INNER PEACE
DON'T GIVE ALL YOUR PERSONAL POWER TO A THERAPIST
THERAPISTS WILL DISAGREE WITH THESE WORDS
FINDING A THERAPIST - SETTING THERAPY GOALS
LIFE IS LUMPY
CHANGES, SELF-GROWTH AND THERAPY DON'T ALWAYS TICKLE
VENTILATION IS NOT ENOUGH
SUFFERING SMARTER IS DUMB
EACH THERAPY HAS ITS OWN LIMITS
ALL PEOPLE DO NOT HAVE THE SAME MOTIVATIONS
FEELINGS
THERAPISTS IN THERAPY
LEMON THERAPISTS
OUR SOCIETY IS ON THE RIGHT TRACK
MISSING FROM THIS BOOK
YOUR PERFECT THERAPY
This Chapter's Quiz
Book Table of Contents
Psychology of Sex Education - Psychological Sexual Health Care
Self Help Free Read - Book Online
SUFFERING SMARTER IS DUMB © 1995-99