BEING YOUR OWN THERAPIST
The following excerpt is from the self help
psychology book, Be Your Own Therapist.
My goal is not to get you to change but to empower you to
change, if that suits your purposes. Frequently there are
choices A and B, in which choice A, though very popular and
often judged as correct, leads to unhappiness. Choice B,
however unpopular, is a growth choice that ultimately leads to
calmness and lack of stress. With my clients and with you, the
reader, my goal is to show you such choices. I fully accept your
choice and clients' choices to retain unhappiness. However, I
do hammer clients over the head with such
unhappy choices. For they (and you) are the ones choosing to
retain the unhappiness by continually selecting unhappy choice A.
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One recurring attribute of people who have happiness (or inner peace or contentment) is the attribute of being grateful and appreciative for what is all around them. Do you need to develop this for yourself? |
For example, men in this culture historically have made the
choice not to feel sadness and grief (i.e., choice A). The
result is a wide array of acting-out behavior such as
unreasonable anger or drug/ alcohol/ sexual/ gambling
addictions. Such behavior temporarily relieves the stress that
arises in situations that potentially might trigger sadness or
grief. If such men learned instead to accept their feelings of
sadness and grief, then the experience of such feelings (i.e.,
choice B) would change those so-called "bad" feelings to ones of
contentment and OKness. (Please read Chapter 9 for more about
this choice.) To be your own therapist, you must first have
knowledge of the existence of such choices so that you can make
them consciously. There may be many possible choices for you to
make as you read this book; each will have repercussions in
terms of your health and happiness.
Knowledge of what various therapies are trying to accomplish is
often lacking in clients. How in such cases could clients have
personal power? Therefore, just knowing what therapy is trying
to accomplish can often be a significant step toward its
accomplishment. Consequently, two major focuses in this book are
on (1)what therapy is trying to do and (2)how you, the reader,
can do as much of it as possible.
I do not intend to imply that all your growth work can be done
without the aid of a therapist. Instead, do as much as you can
and use a therapist as an adjunct/ assistant for what you can't
accomplish by yourself. Sometimes assistants know more about
certain issues than the boss. The wise boss accepts that without
believing either that the assistant is boss or that the
assistant knows everything. Remember that you, not the
therapist, are the ultimate boss.*
Next Excerpt 
| Human existence can be considered a house of four rooms, the rooms of 1.the body, 2.the mind, 3.the emotions and 4.spirituality. Which rooms do you favor or leave unattended? |
More Excerpts This Chapter
DOING 90+% OF THERAPY YOURSELF
POPULAR IDEAS MAY BE HARMFUL TO YOUR HAPPINESS
EMPOWERING YOURSELF
HELP FOR YOUR PROBLEMS?
WE ARE LIKE FIXER-UPPER HOUSES
LET ME BE YOUR GURU
FOLLOW YOUR OWN YELLOW BRICK ROAD
FIND YOUR OPTIMUM THERAPEUTIC FOCUS
BEING YOUR OWN THERAPIST
THERE ARE MANY CHOICES
BEING GRATEFUL AND APPRECIATIVE
This Chapter's Quiz
Book Table of Contents
Psychology of Sex Education - Psychological Sexual Health Care
BEING YOUR OWN THERAPIST © 1995-2004