How Childhood Abandonment Trauma Affects Attachment Styles in Adults. Best Online Attachment and Trauma Therapy.

Childhood trauma and life-changing experiences have a direct impact on how to develop attachment styles in adulthood.

Attachment styles are primarily based on the interaction between a caregiver or parent and a child from infant stages through to toddler and teenage years. If childhood trauma is left unresolved it can lead to developing negative attachment styles. The impact of negative attachment styles in adulthood can lead to the inability of effective and healthy emotional expression. Causing challenges in developing and maintaining healthy relationships.

childhood abandonment trauma

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How do I find an online attachment therapist near me?

Finding an online attachment specialist is easy with BetterHelp. We have created an accurate and seamless 5-minute sign-up method that will have you matched and connected to the most appropriate, eligible, and professional attachment therapists to choose from. Simply complete this questionnaire carefully. Be sure to answer honestly as we use your answers to match you with the best-suited attachment therapists. BetterHelp online methods of attachment therapy are highly affordable, convenient, and effective.

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With 24-hour access to your chosen attachment therapist, you have the freedom to plan and schedule your sessions according to your availability. BetterHelp allows you to change therapists if at any point you feel dissatisfied.

What is childhood abandonment trauma in adults?

Childhood abandonment trauma in adults is a result of being exposed to traumatic events, abuse, neglect, or various forms of abandonment. When a child experiences emotional, verbal, or physical abuse from a caregiver or parent, they become at risk of psychological damage. Consequently, this can develop into negative attachment styles, behavioral disorders, or psychological disorders such as depression, anxiety, PTSD, CPTSD, BPD, and various other challenges.

When a child is emotionally or physically abandoned by a provider, primary caretaker, or parent at any stage in their lives, they are made to feel unsafe, insecure, and unprotected. This results in an intense emotional response to the abandonment, known as – abandonment trauma.

Abandonment trauma impacts the way you interact with others, as well as the way you perceive yourself. The significance of abandonment trauma is that it causes immense emotional pain that can complicate various behavioral, attachment, and emotional challenges.

How does childhood trauma affect attachment style in adults?

Childhood trauma impacts how we develop attachment styles in adulthood. The most common attachment style as a consequence of childhood abandonment is insecure attachment. Although the abandonment may not have been intentional, as a child due to a lack of emotional understanding and cognitive perception they may interpret the situation as abandonment and cause them to categorize it as a traumatic event.

If a child grew up with an emotionally detached or dismissive and unavailable parent, or experienced a physically absent family member or loved one, this can lead to the experience of traumatic stress. The long-term effects of childhood abandonment can heavily affect your mental health as well as internal coping mechanisms. Abandonment trauma in adults can cause fear of abandonment as one of the long-term effects of childhood abandonment trauma if left untreated. The effects of childhood abandonment are known to resurface in adulthood.

It is common for adults with abandonment issues to experience negative behaviors as a manifestation of unresolved childhood trauma such as depression, anxiety, anger issues, or paranoia.

In cases of childhood trauma, it is commonly known to negatively impact adult relationships, whether intimate relationships or partnerships through to family relationships. This is a consequence of not being able to be vulnerable, accept love, and trust others. Childhood trauma in adults is likely to develop into various symptoms of mental health conditions.

Common signs of childhood trauma affecting adulthood:

  • The denial of the trauma
  • Substance abuse or misuse
  • Negative self-esteem
  • Eating disorders
  • Depressive episodes, self-harm, suicidal thoughts
  • High-risk behavior
  • Fear of intimacy
  • Lack of trust
  • Codependency

It is crucial to reach out to a professional attachment specialist to assist you with clearly understanding the childhood trauma and abandonment you have experienced.  As well as the causes and effects that it may have on your attachment style as an adult.

How to overcome abandonment issues from childhood?

Overcoming abandonment issues requires exploring the trauma that may have happened, revisiting this by yourself could cause high levels of stress and anxiety and it is always advisable to seek support from a professional attachment therapist or mental health support professional. Although it is entirely possible to overcome childhood abandonment issues in adults you will need guidance and support.

To heal and overcome abandonment issues, you need to address the wound.

Steps to help you overcome abandonment issues:

1. The grieving process.

Abandonment is painful. It is the loss of something you deserved and never received which has now left a wound. To heal this wound, you need to grieve the loss. The first step to overcoming is to address the feelings of hurt, anger, frustration, anxiety, or sadness that you may have felt. It is suggested to write a letter to the person as though you would be giving it to them, it is a method of processing and addressing the emotions.

2. Allow yourself to feel.

Try not to push the feelings that come up away, it’s important to let them out entirely and as they come out. This helps you to release and express those emotions.

3. Identify what hurt the most.

If the abandonment happened during your childhood, imagine yourself as that child again. Visualize what you were feeling and what behaviors or actions made you feel this way. Write these down.

4. Picture your compassionate and healthy self.

It’s important to allow yourself to offer your younger, abandoned hurt self the love, protection, empathy, encouragement, and validation that you were deprived of. This is a crucial part of healing.

5. Identify your coping mechanisms.

Take note of what you do when you feel hurt, sad, rejected, ignored, or angry. Whether self-isolating, silent, or angry outbursts. Write those down and reassure yourself that there is no need for that anymore, you are healing the abandoned child in you, and you are safe, loved, protected, and seen.

These steps are the process of acknowledging, processing, and honoring your feelings. In doing this you are allowing yourself to deeply understand and address the hurt you have felt. It is part of the journey to overcome abandonment issues.

In addition to these self-help steps, please be advised to reach out to a professional attachment therapist that can help you further understand and address your challenges.

How do Online attachment and trauma therapy work?

Fear of abandonment in adulthood as a result of the psychological effects of childhood abandonment has proven to be potentially detrimental to many adults with abandonment issues.

Understanding childhood trauma and abandonment is the first step to identifying the attachment style you have as an adult. Online attachment and trauma therapy will help you overcome childhood abandonment issues as an adult as well as understand the psychological effects of childhood abandonment on adults. With the help of a professional attachment therapist, you will be able to clearly identify and acknowledge your childhood trauma and how it directly affects your attachment style as an adult.

With direct access to your chosen attachment therapist, you have the advantage of planning and scheduling therapy sessions entirely based on your availability.

How will Online attachment and trauma therapy improve my life?

Letting go of childhood abandonment trauma allows you to develop healthier coping mechanisms and behavioral habits. Online attachment and trauma therapy will guide you through unpacking the psychological effects of your childhood abandonment. You will address the effects that it may have had on your adult life and attachment style. With the help of your attachment therapist, you will learn how to maintain healthy relationships, express yourself effectively, and live a happier life.

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